Another Way to Love
by Shikonaurum
Summary: JennaxAlex. All his life, Alex has always watched the world from afar. But when someone comes into his life offers a way into the world again- the world that nearly destroyed him- will he take it? And what price will it be to not accept?
1. Prologue

This is going to be a short prologue, mainly because I'm supposed to do a project, but my procrastination is taunting me.. ^^; Yeah, that's me. The one who procrastinates and then shouts blame at somebody else for wasting my time. I love this world. 

So.. to the point, here we go! Jenna/Alex! (My very first Jenna/Alex.. What's the world coming to?)

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Another Way to Love 

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"Alex?" A soft, timid voice asked quietly, as if afraid to anger the Mercury Adept that was standing right before her. In truth, it couldn't be more of an oxymoron. The adept tended to be even-tempered and calm, even in the worst of situations. He seemed cold hearted and obnoxious, yet at the same time his attitude was the kind that you'd think was ideal. But whatever emotions he kept bottled up inside, on the outside he remained composed, and nothing would seem to irritate or anger him. 

Yet nothing seemed to make the water adept to be happy, either.   

The Fire Adept that spoke those timid words was usually rash and stubborn, but something inside her had changed as she laid her eyes upon the Mercury Adept. There was a calm and tranquil air around him, and when Alex was present everything seemed drawn to him. His image was like a king at the top of his splendor, yet a humble and compassionate king at that. However, one could perceive that many things troubled his mind greatly. If there were to be any emotions shown from the water adept out of the core groups of fear, anger, and love- anger would be the one present. His icy stare seemed to pierce through you and beyond- as if perceiving things you wished no one to see. His lips were forever twisted into a grim smile, laughing at the irony of the world. But that made the rash fire adept drawn to him even more.

"Hmm?" Alex turned his head around quickly, nearly startled, if one of his nature could be so. His hair whirled around with him, a few locks lapping on his face as he looked behind him. "Oh, it's you, the new girl on this block." He said casually, blowing off the locks of hair that settled on his face. Though the fire adept would be at about Alex's age, or a few years younger. The Mercury Adept didn't speak it in a condescending tone- but the voice hadn't been full of welcome either. "You're Felix's sister." He didn't say it like a question, but he said it firmly, though they hadn't been really introduced.

"Yeah." The girl said, shrugging. "That's me.." 

"I don't believe we've been.." Alex struggled slightly, looking for the correct words. "I don't believe we've been formerly introduced, my dear." That tone again. "Indeed, we haven't.." He stuck out his gauntleted hand, and the fire adept took it and they shook hands. "I'm Alex." He smiled softly as he said his name, as if he was a pedestrian watching an introduction of himself. "And you would be.."

"I'm Jenna."

"It's nice to meet you, Jenna, my dear." He remained smiling softly, but Jenna released her hand his eyes grew troubled.

"The pleasure is mine.." Jenna said softly, gazing into the troubled eyes of the Mercury Adept. She perceived the depth within them, and the sorrow that lined the edges of his life. Unable to bear such depth, she turned her head away in disdain.

"Farewell, my dear.." Alex murmured. "Farewell.." If anyone looked hard enough, there would be a single tear dripping down his porcelain skin. That tear representing what he had lost, that made him so bitter, and what he could gain.. If he had the strength to confront his past, and try to open up to the world that was so hostile to him in the beginning.. If he had the courage to risk it all on one thing, and face the consequences of loss.. If only.. But 'ifs' are not 'wills'.. Nor do they determine the future. 

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TBC 

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:P Don't say it was short. Or I'll say 'I told you so.' Just a little teaser, you could say.. Just a little teaser. The last sentence or two was based off the poem 'If' by Rudyard Kipling.. I was reading it while my English teacher was talking about pronouns.. It's a good poem. So, what did you think of my pitiful prologue? Go ahead, review, and say it sucks.. But tell me a reason why. No use in useless flames. 

So.. Please review, give me ideas (no one has ever really given me ideas in reviews, be the first), and if you wish to write this story on your own, go ahead, I'll give it to you. ^^

Thank you for reading this far!

*hurries back to doing science project*

~Mayara


	2. Chapter 1

Gomen! I notice my inactivity lately (if you count 4 months as _lately_). I'm sorry, I had so much to do… But I'm writing now, and that's what counts, right? A few days ago was my birthday, and I'm finally 13… Not that I want to be 13 or anything. I just wanna remain a kid…

Thank you guys a lot for reviewing!!! I know I'm being annoying by saying I got a lot of reviews when truthfully they were gathered over the duration of 5 or so months, but… What can I say? I never knew that Alex/Jenna would catch so many people's eyes… Slight OOC, Alex. I never understand why people say in the reviews that I always have people in character… I never knew it posed a challenge to most. O.o Mainly family issues this chapter, I'm sorry. More Alex/Jenna in later chapters… If I ever get around to it.

Me has the third chapter planned out, but is too lazy to write. Heck, I can't even get through _this_ chapter.

Alex strode back into the campsite, his head clouded over in thoughts. His eyes, for once, were not the piercing kind usually seen in the blue depths. They were of the dreamy kind, signifying how much different he could have been if not for the times. The eyes were a living reminder of the pain that he and his group had suffered to get so far. They glistened as light hit them, and although his face was set in a frowning way, his eyes showed his real expression.

They always had.

The Mercury Adept's eyes had shown tears and worry when a smile rested on his face. It was a rainy day, so Felix and the Proxan couple didn't notice that more water than usual was on his face. His mouth usually made the lies about his feelings, voicing out different opinions than his heart felt. '_How very hypocritical…'_ Alex thought to himself bitterly, trying to regain composure of his feelings as he strode through the remaining bit of forest. '_But then again, life never provided me with much of a different choice…'_

His mind repeated that phrase a hundred times over, each time more mocking than the last. _A choice… choice… decision… No, it left me stranded here… _Memories of his past in Imil fluttered by, slowly progressing to the recollections that he had willed himself to forget. Blood was everywhere… A bloodied sword with no owner, though many wounded or dead lying along side it… A child alone on the streets, crying… Villagers resorting to anger out of desperation, brandishing their weapons, not even knowing what they themselves were doing until it was too late… A girl, desperation in her eyes; but he was too helpless to move and comfort her… Everything he stashed in the corner of his mind was emerging out of its prison, plaguing him with mental anguish.

_Turmoil,_ he thought. _That's what it is… Turmoil in my brain. I must be losing it…_ There was bitter tone in the thought, along with a laugh that was devoid of hope. Taking a deep breath, he willed himself to shove everything away, to lose himself in the void that the Mercury Adept himself had created. All emotions and memories were locked away, good with the bad. Alex's eyes hardened once the moment of mental trauma was over with, although a slight tinge of relief and regret shone in his eyes.

Alex let out a heavy sigh full of mental fatigue, emerging from the woods to enter the makeshift camp. His eyes fell onto Jenna, who was chatting with Felix and an old man around a tent. Actually, it was more of a teary reunion than anything. Jenna was sobbing, trying to regain control over herself, while telling her tale. Alex glanced at her for a little while, each time the bonds that held himself in check weakening. The girl was another reminder… She felt almost like _her…_ Not in looks, not even in personality. But there was just something inside…

_'All those tears… I wish someone could brush them away…' _Alex thought, leaning against a tree watching the three. _'You're her brother, aren't you, Felix? All those tears… Like crystals, but no one bothers to pick them up… I don't want to see your crying face anymore, Jenna…'_

Jenna strode back to the camp. She had quickly turned away and walked off as Alex turned the conversation a tad too personal, but was now contemplating how rude that possibly would have been. She had no problem doing that to her friends, just walking away, but she didn't even know the Mercury Adept. There was something in his cold eyes that reminded Jenna of another blue-eyed male. He hadn't been as distant, or in such turmoil, but all the same you could perceive everything about him in his eyes. Ever since that tragic day, he seemed to harden, locking himself away. He was always open physically, but there was no warmth in his eyes or arms when he talked, at times.

"Isaac…" Jenna said softly, gazing up at the sky. "Oh, Isaac…" She had often tried to bring the blonde out of his bad days, but failed to do so. _'Maybe I'm just not meant for him… Maybe I just can't help him. I'm a good friend, but we couldn't classify as lovers…'_ Jenna thought. "Perhaps there's someone out there for you," she said softly. "Someone who may bring you out of that prison of yours. There may even be another person for me, Isaac…" Jenna blinked back tears as she looked up towards the sky. The sun was so bright today…_'For me…'_

"Jenna! There you are!" A voice that she had not heard for three years emerged from the trees. "I've been looking all over for you. That old man Kraden wished for me to tell my tale, and that you'd better come to." There was a hesitation in his voice, just then. "I have to tell you something. It's important."

Jenna simply stared blankly at her brother. She had trained herself to accept the fact that she was the only one in the family that was still alive. Nothing could provoke her to break down over the fact. After almost a year of mourning and crying, she got over herself. Only once in a while, when she saw the boys trying so hard to master psyenergy, she would always cynically wonder _why_. Why did they try so hard, when something they couldn't stop happened in the past? How did the actually expect to be become strong in Vale, that little peaceful town? The fierce determination that shone in Isaac's eyes was hurtful to watch; at moments like those, he would simply ignore anyone who was standing by. Even afterwards, if she tried talking to him, there would be no kind answer that was typical of the former Isaac.

So imagine how she felt, when everything she trained herself to accept, came crashing down as a lie. Jenna continued to stare at her brother. His appearance didn't exactly _change_ over the past three years, though he seemed more rugged and untamed. Tears began to well in her eyes, before she could stop them.

"Jenna?" Felix asked, noticing his sister's blank look. "I'm sorry… I know it must be hard on you, everything that just happened… We never meant for any of this to happen, but I wanted to see you once more, just see how you were doing. I'm sorry about Isaac and Garet… We didn't mean to kill them, I swear…"

Jenna looked sorrowfully, her scarlet eyes brimming with tears. "Why… Why did you just leave me all alone like that? Why did you leave me? Alone…" Felix looked away. He had never been good at keeping eye contact, and was never the best to comfort anyone. In fact, no one in the group seemed like much of a team player- they all drifted into their own little world. "I'm starting to think that nobody can stay close to me… You disappeared, and so did mom and dad, and now Garet and Isaac… Perhaps I'm destined to be alone… I almost believe myself when I tell myself that this is just all a dream, and that I'll wake up… But I don't wake up and be all alone again, Felix."

Felix sighed heavily, then pulled his sister closer to him. "I'm sorry, Jenna. But I couldn't find a way to get back to you… But now that we're together, I'm not going to lose you anymore," Felix attempted to explain. A slight tremor in his voice indicated his doubts, but Jenna was to enrapt in her tears to detect it. ""But… Please, Jenna. Come on. I want to tell you… Why."

Jenna's eyes turned upward toward her brother. During the whole three years she had yearned to know why, but suddenly she was afraid. "I'm not sure if I want to know… I don't want to get close to anyone anymore. Not after mom and dad died…" She started sobbing again, face in hands. "I don't want to feel anymore pain…"

Felix stared, his eyes twitching with annoyance. He hadn't expected the reunion to start off with so many tears. "Goddamnit, Jenna!" He snapped irritably. "I'm not sure what pain I had put you through, but can't you just leave your past behind?" Jenna's sobs quietly receded as she heard Felix's outburst. Turning her head upwards again, her eyes trembled with tears. Felix resisted the urge to look away, continuing, "Do you really want anyone to be near you again? Isn't that why you're crying? Because you had nobody to love you. And now that I come along again, you don't want that love because you fear you may be hurt. That's just selfish. There's more to life than just you. I'm not sure what happened while I was gone, and you have my pity, but I'm not going to let you lose yourself in it." Shadows crossed his face as clouds gathered in front of the sun. The trees swayed as a gentle breeze blew through the forest, the wind becoming stronger and stronger.

Felix looked down at his sister, then placed his hand on her shoulder, nearly withdrawing it as she flinched. He looked hurt as he stared Jenna down. "I don't bite, Jenna. Can't you remember who I am?"

Jenna simply stared, shaking. "I'm just afraid… To find this all a dream. I just can't believe it's you…"

"I'm apologize for the outburst, Jenna. I just thought you needed to know."

"I'm fine now, so don't worry," Jenna said steadily, although Felix couldn't help but notice that she mentioned nothing about accepting his apology. "But… The person I just met… Acted like what I just was, sort of…" Jenna raised her head, looking at Felix.

"You met Alex?" Felix asked, although it was of no inquisitive tone. It was more of a statement. "Alex is… different… What did you think of him?" Taking her hand, Felix led his little sister back to the campsite, where Kraden was waiting.

"He's… nice… but he felt lonely. I wanted to help him, but he seems unreachable. He nearly reminds me of Isaac…" Jenna felt a pang in her heart as she mentioned her friend's name, and tears started spilling out again.

"Somebody has to save them, Felix… Isaac and Alex. You can't just let them lose themselves any further than the already have."

"So you've sensed that too…" Felix murmured. "When I was a child, when mom and dad felt down, I always used to ask if they were alright. And they'd always say yes… So I started to doubt my intuition. I'm not sure what feelings to trust anymore…"

Jenna placed her hand on Felix's chest. "Trust your heart, Felix…" Kraden watched as they talked more, often opening his mouth to say something but thinking the better of it. "Isaac… I'm not sure what happened to him. But it seemed that his care for others sometimes died after his dad drowned…"

Kraden finally spoke. "Felix, I think it's about time you tell her…"

Jenna paid no attention to Kraden's words at first, lost in thought. _'I want to save them… but… can I?'_

Alex sighed, withdrawing to his tent as Jenna slowly wiped her own tears away. Nobody seemed to want to interfere in Jenna's emotional breakdown, even when she seemed to need love the most. _'In a way, she's like _her…_ And in a way, she's like me. Alone in this world… But she seems to still have people who care…'_

As he nearly closed the tent, a plant right next to his shelter caught his eye. A solitary flower, developing thorns on its sides. Alex looked at the flower sadly, his eyes full of pity as he pricked himself on the flower. Learning to grow up… alone… causes the thorns of pain to grow… Did the flower ever know love? Perhaps the thorns were to keep things away… Or to selfishly guard the love within…

He fingered with the flower a little more, attaining scratches where he held the stem too tightly. _'I wonder if there's another flower out there… For me…'_ he thought to himself.

Leaning down, he gently uprooted the flower. His perfect hands would be scarred for a while by the blood, but he found the flower so very much like himself.

Plucking a petal from the flower, he murmured, "Somebody loves me… Somebody loves me not…" Soon only the thorny stem remained, and Alex stood amidst a pile of white petals. He seemed thoughtful of the flower's outcome, as he had been expecting the opposite.

"Somebody loves me…" 

TBC

I apologize for the rushed ending, but I wanted to get this fic done some time this century. My apologies to the reviewers who waited an insanely long time to get this, if you were disappointed, I don't blame you. Please review!!! Wheee…. 13…. And I hate it already….


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